What is Loneliness

 

Loneliness is a feeling of emptiness or hollowness inside. You feel isolated or separated from the world or cut off from those you would like to have connection with. There are different kinds and different degrees of loneliness. You might experience loneliness as a vague feeling that something is not right. Or you might feel loneliness as an intense deprivation and deep pain. One type of loneliness might be related to missing a specific individual because they have died or because they are so far away. Another type might involve feeling alone and out of contact with people because you are actually physically isolated from people i.e- in your work role. You might even feel emotionally isolated when you are surrounded by people but are having difficulty in reaching out to them.

Loneliness is also a state of mind – a perception of being alone- and this can cause people to feel unwanted. People who are lonely often crave human contact, but their state of mind makes it more difficult to form connections with other people.

It is only when we seem trapped in our loneliness that it becomes a real issue.

 

What Causes Loneliness?

Loneliness has no single common cause, so the preventions and treatments for this distressing state of mind vary dramatically.

 

According to research by John Cacioppo, a University of Chicago psychologist and one of the top loneliness experts, loneliness is strongly connected to genetics. Other contributing factors include situational variables, such as physical isolation, moving to a new location, divorce, or the death of someone significant in a person's life.

 

Loneliness can also be attributed to internal factors such as low self-esteem. People who lack confidence in themselves often believe that they are unworthy of the attention or regard of other people. This can lead to isolation and chronic loneliness.

 

The Health Consequences of Loneliness

High levels of loneliness are associated with physical health symptoms, living alone, small social networks and low quality social relationships. Loneliness can also be a symptom of depression. Cacioppo reports that "Lonely adults consume more alcohol and get less exercise than those who are not lonely” and “Their diet is higher in fat, their sleep is less efficient, and they report more daytime fatigue. Loneliness also disrupts the regulation of cellular processes deep within the body, predisposing us to premature aging."

Loneliness has a wide range of negative effects on both physical and mental health. Some of the health risks associated with loneliness include:

 

• Increased stress levels                     Poor decision-making             Depression and suicide

• Antisocial behavior                         Alcoholism and drug abuse    Altered brain function

• Decreased memory & learning        Cardiovascular disease and stroke

• The progression of Alzheimer's disease

 

What to do about Loneliness

 

• Acknowledge that loneliness is a sign that something needs to change. Expressing our feelings may lead us to discover that we feel a number of things which might be connected to our feelings of loneliness, including sadness, anger, and frustration. We may then be able to begin to see where these feelings are coming from—what they are connected with in our lives. As we begin to see the connections we will be more able to begin to make changes.

• Understand the effects that loneliness has on your life - physically and mentally.

• Talk with a therapist about the underlying dynamics and triggers so that you can develop strategies to move forward.